You have tenacity, grit, and ambition.
You get things done.
People look to you to see projects and initiatives through from start to finish.
You manage teams with finesse, and you embrace a coaching mindset, for yourself, and those you lead.
You are smart, adept, agile, and a few steps ahead of the game.
But there are cracks starting to show from the strain.
From home, to work, to our current world of work-from-home + homeschool, your powerhouse of mission, vision and focus has started to flicker.
Questions today slowly arise from the center of your being, and for the first time in a long time, you feel uncertain, confused, and unclear.
But there is something beneath that. You also feel that somewhere within you, are your answers to your deeper purpose, your soul journey, and the ability to navigate your life by a deep inner knowing.
As a young child, I was tapped into this deeply.
However, my inner knowing of self was stripped through an emotionally turbulent childhood.
My parents loved me, I love them deeply to this day, and I did not get the emotional stability I needed.
Fast forward many years, and in 2012, a person very close to me had what's considered a psychotic break and started showing clear signs of mental illness. I understand it as their coping mechanisms for a chronic crisis of the heart, mind and spirit, and it was not sudden.
However, at this crux moment when it occurred, and for the next five years, sadness, anger, frustration, and the sheer weight of it compounded by wild demands and expectations crippled me. Any thoughts I had about moving forward with bigger goals in my life were sidelined.
I suffered depression, bouts of rage and anger, as well as the arrival of stress-induced hives and rashes on my body.
So much confusion about who I was, my role, and how I was supposed to be versus what I was feeling were tearing me apart.
I wanted to do the right things and I didn't know what they were.
Over these same years, really wonderful things happened too, but that really pushed me to the max in my capacity to cope with stress.
I became a parent and had two kids, and during this time became the sole earner for our family while my husband returned to school.
This person in struggle then moved from 1,000+ miles away to 5 miles away from us. In the beginning I thought I could be more helpful.
Until I could not breathe.
These conditions forced me to go within.
Counseling and therapy during this time helped me to get above water and gasp for air, but that was only the beginning.
I knew I had to tap in to this primal urge to go within to heal the wounds left festering for 30+ years that weren't allowing me to be centered amidst this deeply upsetting drama and confusion.
I knew the systems, structures and paradigms I'd been subscribed to in many areas of my life were not serving me and needed replacing.
Ultimately, I learned it was not my job to "fix" anyone, which is what I realized I had been trying to do.
I learned that in even showing up in certain ways I created more chaos and confusion when I was still tapped in to old stories and paradigms.
I was my own key, and my own foil, to getting grounded amidst this perpetual typhoon.
I finally took the tools I'd been collecting since my early 20's in yoga, mindfulness, meditation, spirituality and writing and began to put it together systematically for myself.
Today, I have a relationship with this person that is safe to me. Our relationship, to the extent that it can, has improved. They have moved back to their previous home, once my energy was no longer available to them, they left.
Today I am centered and grounded in a coaching practice that emerged ultimately as a product from my own experience of this chaos and turmoil.
I see much more clearly where it is right for me to step in and support, and where it is not. Today I have grown, cultivated, and created exponentially further what had laid latent, for years.
My practice today is my bedrock.
It is in my approach to parenting, how I show up in community and to the world, and gives me constancy amidst discomfort, and confidence amidst sweeping changes.
Best of all, it gives me space to breathe and to continue to emerge into my work, purpose and craft, even when life is busy and the day to day gets real.
Your challenges may be different than mine, but I assure you that I can and will support you to learn to separate yourself from that which doesn't serve you, as well as coach you to allow what truly does serve you to emerge.
We all come from different stories, backgrounds, and situations that forge who and how we are today.
My tools of the trade are meditation and mindfulness. I also work with energy, automatic writing, and symbolic insight.
I use and teach these tools to my clients as we do an overview of your life path, where you've been, where you are, and where you might want to be in the future.
I will help you to tap in to your own inner knowing and support you in building skills in discernment, boundary setting, and acute mental, physical and psychic energy management.
You will start to understand your challenges as teachers, failures as reasons to celebrate, conflict as insight, and the world as an expansive, abundant, and immensely supportive place to live.
Fear will become your compass point, showing you the direction in which you need to grow.
You will begin to navigate with a deep feel for undercurrents that run cross-ways from what you might see in front of you.
Most importantly, you will build a relationship of trust, love, and respect for what you already have within you.
You will unwrap the gifts that you were born with, and bring them to light.
You will add your light to the world and we will all benefit from it.